IF I WERE GOING TO WRITE A BLOG IN AN ATTEMPT TO WIN FRIENDS…

3.27.13

This would not be it! If however I were writing a blog in an attempt to influence people, I’d strongly hope this would be the one. The topic of conversation here is one of controversy, especially in the Bible Belt from whence I proudly hail. If you have yet to figure out which hot topic I am referring to it is that of marriage equality. For the better part of the day my Facebook newsfeed has been flooded with both signs of support and disdain regarding the matter. As the day progressed and the posts became nastier and more self righteous my irritation grew… I would like to believe that I am a pretty tolerant person, your views upon your life and the way in which you choose to live it deserve my respect and I expect the same from you regarding the choices I make for my life… One thing however, that I will gladly admit I’m pretty intolerant of is the hatefulness that many people use to belittle the lives that others have chosen for themselves. I have never understood and probably will never understand why anyone possesses such a desperate need to let the world know that their chosen way is so absolute. And in proclaiming such, must also state that all other perceptions of life, love and relationships are completely wrong and immoral. Ok, let’s go with that, lets say that you’re religious beliefs are indeed absolute truth and that god would be very upset if you in fact chose this lifestyle for yourself… I have the perfect solution to your dilemma, do not choose this lifestyle for YOURSELF! Throughout my religious upbringing there was this recurring theme called “free will” this would be the perfect chance for you to exercise it… Just sayin!

I personally think that’s a pretty clear cut answer to any problems one might have with the issue of same sex marriage but if you’re still on the fence I’ll give you just a little bit more to chew on…

If I’ve heard it once I’ve heard it one thousand four hundred and fifty three times: “This country was built on Christianity and the contents of the bible” (which isn’t entirely accurate according to those things I learned while acquiring a political science degree)… However, if one is going to use such arguments, one must also acknowledge a few key points from the very foundations of our great nation i.e. separation of church and state, the rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness and so on and so forth. Oddly enough they did not specify which churches were exempt from this constitutional decree nor did the founding fathers establish which forms of happiness were appropriate to pursue, it simply said that all “men” are created equal and that they were endowed with these unalienable rights…

Still not convinced? Ok, let’s talk about hiding your personal judgement behind god and religion… If I hear “I’m not judging anyone, I don’t have to, God’s already stated his position on the matter and its wrong!” one more time I may be the first human to successfully roll my eyes out of my own head. Just a little FYI, that’s still judging and it’s not your place. If you believe so firmly in your own religious practice then you’d stand down, let everyone make their own life choices and allow the creator to handle his business. “Well I’m so tired of everyone jumping on Christians for standing up for their beliefs” and “You say don’t judge and be tolerant but the first thing you do is write a blog and condemn our belief system” two things I’m sure I’ll hear upon publishing this blog. Here’s my answer to that: I am not here to condemn nor judge your faith and beliefs, they are yours and I respect your dedication and commitment to them. But, if you didn’t catch the key word in that last sentence I’ll say it again, they are YOUR beliefs! It is a big broad world out their filled with thousands of differing belief systems, even as many as 34,000 different sects of Christianity. All of which I’m sure believe strongly that their personal convictions are the ones that are most pleasing to God. This particular debate however should not be a question of “I’m right and your wrong” this should be a question of the basic human right to choose the life that you wish to live, one of the reasons our forefathers declared independence and founded this nation…

Sanctity: The state or quality of being holy, sacred, or saintly. Ultimate importance and inviolability.

So you’re worried that the allowance of same sex marriage will somehow destroy the “sanctity” of marriage? Newsflash boys and girls, I know plenty of marriages that are far from holy, sacred and by no means saintly… They are convenient, they are loveless, they are abusive, but they are in no way sanctified, yet still those remain legal. Of course I know just as many marriages that are healthy, loving and happy. I doubt the people in these relationships would hardly agree that the marriage of another couple, homosexual or not, would ever have the ability to lessen the value of the marriage that they are in. Quite frankly the only relationship of two consenting adults that you should be concerned with is your own. I personally have never met a homosexual person that has tried to convert a heterosexual person to their sexual orientation. I have personally never met a homosexual person who insists that their lifestyle choice is the correct one for a heterosexual person. And, I have personally never met a homosexual person who actively tries to change a heterosexual persons moral beliefs for their own life. I have met quite a few however that would appreciate the same respect and courtesy from the innumerable heterosexual people who do these things to them, I’m sure on a daily basis…

This is not a debate about right and wrong, how you choose to live should be just that, a choice. I personally have dear friends who have struggled their entire lives with feelings of unworthiness and shame because the feelings that come naturally to them have been labeled wrong, immoral, disgusting and abnormal. This may be your personal belief and you have the right to it, but they have the right to their beliefs as well. They have the right to pursue happiness in the life decisions that they make and to live the life they choose whether it measures up to your moral standards or not. I mean, I wonder how you would feel if someone from another religion, say a Muslim, came into your home and told you that you could no longer own a gun? Oh wait, I know how you would feel because that’s what Barack Obama is trying to do, right? And you’re not having it, right? No one should be able to make that choice for you, right? Right! So, just keep that in mind the next time you want to make a choice for someone else, whether its a choice you agree with or not, unless its YOUR life it shouldn’t be YOUR decision!

As I said in a previous post everyone wants to “cry freedom” when it’s their freedom at stake but we all have to acknowledge that if we want freedom, we have to give freedom. If we want the freedom to own guns, we have to also allow others to own them and live with the consequences no matter how fatal. If we want to worship the god of our choice we have to allow others the same freedom and respect, knowing that by doing so we can still maintain our own personal moral integrity. And, If we want the freedom to choose who we marry, we should realize that everyone should have that very same freedom, whether you agree with their choice or not…

It is not my intention to judge or degrade anyone in their beliefs, it is not my intention to imply that you should change those beliefs and adapt your own life to the beliefs of others. It is my intention to hopefully shed some light on the fact that we all should have the right to live the lifestyle of our own choosing without constant degradation. I once heard that “it is the mark of an intelligent man to be able to entertain the thoughts of others without accepting them as his own.” All I’m asking is that you stop and think about how you would feel if the shoe were on the other foot, if you were fighting for the freedom to live your life as you see fit, something tells me that you would fight ’til the death to attain the freedom you sought… I guess you can’t really blame anyone else for doing the same now can you?